Ice Cream
by UrFavYandere
Summary: Len is bored so he and Rin steal some ice cream. But as they're enjoying themselves in Kaito's closet, they get caught. And their asses are grass. Rated T for Kaito's behavior.


**I'm tired of seeing a bunch of Yuri in the Vocaloid Archive. It's like eveyone that writes a Vocaloid fic is bisexual or something. So guess what I'm doing? I'm putting a crackfic into the mix, bitches! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Vocaloid**

"UUUUGGHHH! I AM SO BORED!" Len groaned, sprawled out on his bed.

"Well, I certainly don't want to hear you complain about it." Rin's bed was across from his. She was sitting down reading a book.

"Hey. I've got something we could do!"

"Your face. It looks so devious." Rin said with a startled look on her own face.

"Right now, I've got a hankering for ice cream. And I know just where to find it."

"Um, in the freezer in the kitchen?" Len shook his head with an evil smirk on his face.

"Oh no. No no no! You remember what happened last time!" Len grabbed his twin's arm and dragged her out of the room kicking and screaming. "NO! NO! I WANT TO LIVE! DON'T DO THIS TO ME LEN! I WANT TO LIVE!"

* * *

"I am going back." Rin said. The Kagamines were outside of Kaito's room.

"Hey, I'm scared about the outcome of this too, but you gotta admit, it's kinda fun, right?"

"Yeah. I guess…" Rin said sheepishly. Opening the door slowly, the two snuck into Kaito's empty room. They proceeded to walk into his closet. Inside there was a safe. "But wait!" Rin spoke up. "What if he changed his combination?"

"So? Give me one of your hairpins." Len held out his hand.

"Alright, FINE." Rin took one out of her hair, making her bangs fall in her face. She handed it to her brother. Len carefully inserted the pin in the small lock for the sake key. After minutes of twisting the pin around in the lock, the safe sprung open.

"Success!" Len cried. The safe was filled with ice cream. When Len picked up one of the cups, it read. "KAITO'S ICE CREAM. KEEP YOUR DITRY STREET MITTS OFF, KAGAMINE!" Len chuckled at the words. He handed another cup of ice cream to his sister.

* * *

Approximately ten minutes later, nearly all of the containers of ice cream were empty.

"And- and so I said, Miku… you can go suck it!" Len giggled.

"Ahaha… that story gets funnier every time you tell it." Rin smiled, flipping her hair out of her face. "Hey check it out I'm an emo boy." Rin flipped her hair over and over again.

"Ahhhh brain freeze!" Len shivered and rubbed his head.

Rin opened another container of ice cream and tossed one to Len.

"Eat it as fast as you can. First one to get a brain freeze wins."

"Ready…? GO!" The two Kagamines emptied the containers in exactly 15 seconds. They stared at each other with confident looks on their faces.

"You know, I've been known to always get brain freezes." Rin said.

"Same here." Len looked at his watch. "It's been exactly ten seconds now." He said.

"Any second now one of us will... GOD DAMMIT THAT HURTS! YES I WIN! OH FUCK!" Rin rubbed her head.

"Well that's just... FIIIINNNEE! I GOT ONE TOO! JESUS CHRIST!" Len pulled his hair.  
Both of their brain freezes lasted for 20 seconds. They sighed and shivered.

"I love you, bro." Rin slurred.

* * *

Bursting through the bedroom door was Kaito. After putting up with the other Vocaloids' shit all day, he wanted to settle down with his ice cream. But he heard giggling in his closet. He rushed over to it and opened the doors.  
The Kagamines looked up at the blue haired man in horror.

"Hey Kaito..." That was all Len could say.

"_All my ice cream is gone..._" Kaito said soflty. His facial expression turned to angry. He removed his belt from his pants.  
"I warned you two to stay the hell away from my ice cream. NOW IMMA WHIP YA'LL LIL NARROW ASSES!"

"No Kaito!" Len begged. "There are still scars on my butt!"

"Has that ever stopped me? That ice cream is for me and me only! I PAY MONEY FOR THAT SHIT!"

"We're sorry!" Rin said.

"I SPENT ALL OF MY MONEY ON THAT ICE CREAM! HOW MANY TIMES I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO FUCK WITH MAH SHIT?!"

"Run." said Rin. The two Kagamines made a break for it. Len made it out of the room, but Kaito had grabbed Rin's arm. Len flinched as he heard the crackling of Kaito's belt against Rin's behind.

"OW! OW! LEN'S HE'S KILLING ME! OW! STOP! HELP!" Kaito pushed Rin out of the room, and she ran as fast as she could.

"GET IN HERE, LEN!" Kaito yelled. Len took a deep breath and slowly walked in the room.

* * *

_Whip! Whip! WHIP! _

_"I DON'T EVER WANT YOU TO FUCK WITH MY SHIT EVER!"_

_"Ow! Kaito!" _

_"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"_

_"Yes!"_

_"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!"_

_"YES!"_

* * *

**Yeah, eveyone can learn from this. Do NOT fuck with Kaito's ice cream.**

**So tell me what you thought of this.**


End file.
